Cardi B Details Having Suicidal Thoughts: "I Wanted To Be Dead"

BY Erika Marie 1275 Views
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The 2022 Met Gala Celebrating "In America: An Anthology of Fashion" - Arrivals
NEW YORK, NEW YORK - MAY 02: Cardi B attends The 2022 Met Gala Celebrating "In America: An Anthology of Fashion" at The Metropolitan Museum of Art on May 02, 2022 in New York City. (Photo by Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for The Met Museum/Vogue)
"It was really bad. It's terrible when people are making fun of you," she said.

Hollywood Unlocked founder Jason Lee has set off a new venture with help from Cardi B. The Jason Lee Show arrives courtesy of Revolt and recently shared its premiere episode with the Grammy winner. This conversation was anticipated due to Lee and Cardi's personal friendship, and the rapper detailing opinions that she may have otherwise avoided with other platforms.

There are several takeaways from Cardi's interview, but fans paid close attention to her responses about ongoing harassment. "I'm afraid to be vulnerable because people wanna say, 'Oh, you looking for sympathy,'" she said.

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"In 2019, I really—I felt like I was like, somebody dead inside a body," Cardi continued. "I kept telling people, 'I just wanna die, I just wish I was dead, I wanna be dead.'"

She said she "couldn't escape" her mind. Offset did his best to help by taking her away from the chaos, including a vacation to the Dominican Republic.

"People from my management was calling me," Cardi also stated, noting they were concerned. "It was really bad. It's terrible when people are making fun of you."

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LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - DECEMBER 14: (L-R) Cardi B and Offset attend Sean Combs 50th Birthday Bash presented by Ciroc Vodka on December 14, 2019 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Kevin Mazur/Getty Images for Sean Combs)
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Cardi brought up the false reports about her having herpes. This was later proven to be untrue in court, but the rapper said it was terrible seeing the world take the rumors as factual.

"I wasn't a celebrity," she added. "I was somebody that really wanted to be dead." Cardi said during this time, it was difficult to be an attentive mother or wife. "It just made me cry. It was a point that I felt like I was so weak of a person that I was [too] weak to be a mom."

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BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA - JUNE 17: Kulture Kiari Cephus and Cardi B attend the Teyana Taylor "The Album" Listening Party on June 17, 2020 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Rich Fury/Getty Images for Def Jam Recordings)
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During this time, Cardi shared that the public was simply under the impression she was "crazy" and "ranting."

Check out her full interview on The Jason Lee Show below.

About The Author
Since 2019, Erika Marie has worked as a journalist for HotNewHipHop, covering music, film, television, art, fashion, politics, and all things regarding entertainment. With 20 years in the industry under her belt, Erika Marie moved from a writer on the graveyard shift at HNHH to becoming a Features Editor, highlighting long-form content and interviews with some of Hip Hop’s biggest stars. She has had the pleasure of sitting down with artists and personalities like DJ Jazzy Jeff, Salt ’N Pepa, Nick Cannon, Rah Digga, Rakim, Rapsody, Ari Lennox, Jacquees, Roxanne Shante, Yo-Yo, Sean Paul, Raven Symoné, Queen Naija, Ryan Destiny, DreamDoll, DaniLeigh, Sean Kingston, Reginae Carter, Jason Lee, Kamaiyah, Rome Flynn, Zonnique, Fantasia, and Just Blaze—just to name a few. In addition to one-on-one chats with influential public figures, Erika Marie also covers content connected to the culture. She’s attended and covered the BET Awards as well as private listening parties, the Rolling Loud festival, and other events that emphasize established and rising talents. Detroit-born and Long Beach (CA)-raised, Erika Marie has eclectic music taste that often helps direct the interests she focuses on here at HNHH. She finds it necessary to report on cultural conversations with respect and honor those on the mic and the hardworking teams that help get them there. Moreover, as an advocate for women, Erika Marie pays particular attention to the impact of femcees. She sits down with rising rappers for HNHH—like Big Jade, Kali, Rubi Rose, Armani Caesar, Amy Luciani, and Omerettà—to gain their perspectives on a fast-paced industry.

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