10. Soulja Boy
Buying sneakers for a fan just out of love is pretty damn solid. I mean, if someone came up to me in the mall saying they were a fan I might be able to grab them a taco from the food court. Hopefully Soulja continues to buy luxury cars by the pair, and kicks for his fans all while tweeting about it. Dude is operating on another stratosphere, cause this isn’t “real life” stuff for the average person.
9. Pharrell
8. Curren$y
6. 50 Cent
There’s just something inherently funny about Fifty trying to stop his son from being mischievous, while he’s made millions exploiting his street life persona. Maybe his sit down with Oprah has him being a lot more Curtis Jackson and less 50 Cent these days.
5. Meek Mill
Finding out most rappers rock fake jewels is like finding out Santa Clause isn’t real. Next you’re going to tell me that rappers don’t actually own all the cars in their videos.
4. Cormega
Anyone who follows this column knows I am not a big proponent of shady cab drivers. I’m sure Cormega’s cabbie was hilarious, and engaging. I’m also sure he was loaded up on a fifth of whiskey. Anytime you have an overly friendly/funny cab driver then it’s probably Jack Daniel’s driving the car.
3. Wiz Khalifa
I wonder if Wiz and Amber Rose will have conjoined burial plots. Being buried with a million dollars isn’t cool. You know what’s cool? Being buried with a BILLION dollars.
Being haunted by the ghost of Gary Coleman wouldn’t be so bad. I can think of a lot scarier ghosts to haunt me from beyond the grave...like that scary-ass Webster (Emmanuel Lewis).
1. Slim Thug
Speaking of the powers above, Slim thanks God for threesomes. What I don’t get is why he’s thanking God for something he said was possible for anyone willing to ask. Just to be safe, next time you have a threesome make sure you thank God, Jesus, Allah, Buddha, and any other higher power you can think of. You can never be too safe when it comes to these matters.
